Trial and Error

Excuse me, does this trouser make my bum look big?

What?

My bum. It does, doesn’t it?

I don’t know!

See those guys over there?

Yeah.

They said I could not make you smile.

They did?

Yeah and now they’re waiting for you to wave at them.

So you want me to wave at them?

No. You don’t have to I will.

Why aren’t they waving back?

They’re probably wondering who I am. I don’t know them.

I thought you said…

Forget about them. They’re not important. I’m more interested in you.

Wa, ok.

I was just seated over there when you walked in and thought to myself.

Yes.

I thought I needed to check if they were real.

If what was real?

Those two.

WHAT!

Those beautiful earrings you got on.

Oh!

They go well with your dress.

Thanks, I guess.

I’m Edward.

Joy.

You must think I’m weird.

Yes you are definitely weird.

Thanks.

Thanks?

For the compliment. That’s the nicest thing you’ve said to me so far Joy.

Do you go asking people about your bum?

No. You?

NO!

I just thought the line “have we met before?” is so over used.

So that was your line?

Kind off.

So now what next?

Well I’m sort of lost right now.

Lost?

Yeah. I did not think I’d get this far. Not with someone like you.

What do you mean by that: “someone like you?”

Someone as pretty as you.

Is that another one of your lines?

Yeah. Told you I was lost. Any hints?

This is the part you’re supposed to ask me what I’m doing here.

What are you doing here?

Waiting for someone.

Who?

What about you? What are you doing here?

Checking you out.

Yeah?

Yeah.

So what do you think?

I think whoever you’re waiting for better come quick.

Why?

Cos I’m trying to make a coup de tat here. All I need’s a phone number.

And why on earth would I give it to you?

Cos every pretty girl needs one and I’m willing to be one.

Be what?

Your stalker.

You said your name is? Edward?

Yes, Edward.

Edward you’re starting to freak me out.

Is that a good thing?

No.

So, I’m not getting it am I?

Nope.

So who are you waiting for anyway?

My boyfriend.

Oh …ok. Is he a big guy?

Yeah and he’s going to bash your head in if you don’t leave now.

Ok. At least I tried. Cant’ blame a guy for trying.

Can’t.

I can live with that. Tell you what, here’s my number.

What for?

Just in case.

In case of what?

In case you need a stalker.

Ok.

I think I should have stopped when you said I was weird.

Are you leaving or should I?

No need to I’m leaving.

Go.

Ok.